Father of Enumclaw Teen Killed on Halloween: "He Took Care of People No One Wanted to Get To Know"

There didn't seem to be a way to keep the green-blue frosting from what should have been Justin Relethford's 17th birthday cake out of mom Teresa's hair and off her nose, cheeks and chin.

The moment she cleaned herself off with a damp washcloth, another handful of the sticky sweet goo wound up somewhere on her face. But aside from a token protest, Teresa didn't seem to mind it too much.

In fact, she was such as much a part of the frosting fight as the dozens of teens who found a friend in her son and gathered for a celebration of his life Saturday at the family's home.

"You hear of Justin's personality and playfulness?" his grandma Janice, Teresa's mother, said from a safe distance. "This is where he gets it from."

There was no argument that Justin was taken from all of them too soon. A 20-year-old Buckley man now sits in King County Jail awaiting his arraignment after he was charged with vehicular homicide during the fatal Halloween accident.

In spite of the small community in which they live, the families have kept their distance. Justin's father Roy said they are following the case of Cody Money, whose initial arraignment was postponed for this Wednesday. Whatever penalties may come forward for Money, Roy said no resolution seems acceptable at this point. "He took a life. ... He took time away from Justin to get to know his nephews, to spend more time with his family and his friends."

Though the undercurrent of anger and sadness was ever present during the gathering, Justin's family and friends were happy to have a frosting fight and play and conjure up happier times with their lost loved one.

They talked about their "Justin Sane," the boy who wore skinny jeans and a lip ring and who would more often than not be perceived as the punk kid who looked different in town rather than what his loved ones knew he was: a boy with a big heart.

Grandma Janice recalls when Justin would visit her, "you never knew what he would look like. He was always a surprise, but he was always so polite."

"He was more of an adult than most adults were," Roy said. "He took care of people no one wanted to get to know."

Matt Sobarzo, a close friend of Justin's admits the two got into their share of antics around town. "We were both really crazy," he said. "That's why we got along so well - he understood me."

Sobarzo, who befriended Justin shortly after moving to Enumclaw, said because of their outward appearances, they were commonly picked on around town. "I was always there for him," he said. "I'd never been that close to anyone before."

Justin was no stranger to bullying, Teresa said, and more often than not got into trouble for defending himself or someone else who was being treated unfairly.

His older brother, Tyler, said Justin simply "didn't care what people thought. I admired that he stood up for himself. He had a strength I didn't have at his age."

A Safe Haven

In the days following Justin's death, the Relethford household became the safe haven for his grieving friends who gathered to share in their sorrow. Even during Saturday's gathering, they retreated to Justin's room for quiet solace.

A family friend commented to Teresa that their opening their home to the kids was important in showing there were "adults who cared."

One person who was a regular at the house was Lyndsie Fischer, Justin's girlfriend who told police he had switched sides with her on the roadway just minutes before he was struck by Money's vehicle.

In her 15 years, Fischer experienced a trauma that most adults couldn't fathom, and her emotions remained palpable. 

Fischer shared she met Justin when they were both students at Enumclaw High School. "I thought, 'wow, he's really sweet,'" she said, and they began texting and spending time together. In an atmosphere where she also felt the pressures of bullying, "Justin stood up for me."

Staying with the Relethfords "helped us a lot to talk about the good times," she said. As Justin's girlfriend, the family took her in as their own and during happier times, invited her on a trip to Oregon which she said, her voice breaking, "was the best trip I'd ever been on."

These days, several paintings that Justin had created for her still sit in her bedroom. At random times, they'd fall to the floor, and Lyndsie said she welcomes those moments because she knows he's with her and can feel his presence. "I knew he'd always protect me," she said. "People assumed he was some punk kid but they'd know that wasn't true if they got to know him. He was probably the best kid I'd ever met in my life."

Dream Big

Difficulties in traditional school found both Justin and Lyndsie working to complete their high school requirements independently, and Lyndsie credits him with motivating her to "dream big," complete her studies and pursue her dreams.

He himself was a big dreamer too, Teresa said. Justin told his mom he wanted to be a tattoo artist and also expressed an interest in forensic science.

"He wanted to be famous," she said. "But he was still young. He was exploring these possibilities."

For Roy, there was no doubt: "he would have done it all."